I was dying for a late night snack after hanging out with a friend on Saturday night, and as I was walking down Vanderbilt on my way home anyway, I fancied partaking in some McDonald’s fayre (corner of Vanderbilt and Atlantic Avenue).

To my glee I saw the lights on, the brightly lit ‘golden arches’, and here I was, 20 feet away…

[pulls on door]

They were closed to walk in customers? Forsooth, this cannot be! As it turns out, it was to be - these sheisters have opted to keep their drive-thru window open 24 hours, but closed off to any foot traffic. So, deftly done, I scarper around the back to order my food from the drive-thru window… nobody there… I walk to the menu with the built-in speaker, nothing for me to press to gain their attention… I walk back to the window again, and this time I spot some headset-toting fella talking to someone in the restaurant. I decided to knock on the window…

[note to those compelled to knock on that glass window at the drive-thru]

Don’t. It’s about 3 inches thick, probably bulletproof - which would make sense them not wanting to have the front doors open through the night - much safer having a 3 inch thick bulletproof barrier between you and the hungry masses of Clinton Hill. So there I was knocking and knocking… the occupants not hearing a thing, completely devoid of my presence, and the rumblings of my empty tum.

[bollocks!]

Summary: if it’s after 11pm and you don’t have a car, forget McDonald’s - you’ll be shit out of luck. Try the King Chicken place on Fulton between Washington and St. James Place - open all night, and no sign of drive-thru-ism.